blublu
06-16-2008, 04:59 PM
Hello,
I have been dating someone for 5 months now and we 're in love. The problem we're having is actually cocaine. he was a user when we started dating, but hasn't done it for a couple of months because I asked him not too. At least as far as I know. I do know that before we met, he used to it very frequently. Every day according to one of his friends. When we met, he had the constant runny nose and accelerated heartbeat that I've read is associated with cocaine addiction. Now, last Friday he said he loved me and wanted to marry me, but that if I didn't understand that he wanted to do cocaine once in a while, he couldn't continue our relationship. He says that it isn't that cocaine isn't more important that I am, but of course that's a lie, because he's willing to break up with me because i don't want him to do cocaine.
I need your advice. I love him and I don't want us to break up over this, but it might come to that. Can you please give me examples or advice, things I can tell him to make him understand why coke, even recreationally, is bad for him? And keeping in mind that as recently as last year, he was more than a recreational user.
Thanks so much for your advice. I really want this relationship to work, but I can't be with someone who doesn't even see why it's harmful. I can't believe he's actually willing to break up with me if I don't shut when he wants to do coke. He says it would only be a couple of time a year, but I don't know. Giving me such an ultimatum does not bode well.
I have been dating someone for 5 months now and we 're in love. The problem we're having is actually cocaine. he was a user when we started dating, but hasn't done it for a couple of months because I asked him not too. At least as far as I know. I do know that before we met, he used to it very frequently. Every day according to one of his friends. When we met, he had the constant runny nose and accelerated heartbeat that I've read is associated with cocaine addiction. Now, last Friday he said he loved me and wanted to marry me, but that if I didn't understand that he wanted to do cocaine once in a while, he couldn't continue our relationship. He says that it isn't that cocaine isn't more important that I am, but of course that's a lie, because he's willing to break up with me because i don't want him to do cocaine.
I need your advice. I love him and I don't want us to break up over this, but it might come to that. Can you please give me examples or advice, things I can tell him to make him understand why coke, even recreationally, is bad for him? And keeping in mind that as recently as last year, he was more than a recreational user.
Thanks so much for your advice. I really want this relationship to work, but I can't be with someone who doesn't even see why it's harmful. I can't believe he's actually willing to break up with me if I don't shut when he wants to do coke. He says it would only be a couple of time a year, but I don't know. Giving me such an ultimatum does not bode well.