What about sex addiction?

[QuietLunatic]

I watch way too much TV: you might have gathered that. I can't remember if it was Oprah or Dr. Phil (my afternoons have free time) that had some people on who claim to be addicted to sex. I wonder if it's the sex or something underlying--a need to be held or something similar.

Any ideas?

[britjojo]

For some I could see it as being a self esteem issue. After all, it is for some going to appear, by the act of sex, as though you are wanted, and if you don't feel wanted any other time it might meet that need.

But I also think that there can be a chemical aspect to it too, like being addicted to a drug. Orgasm causes the release of endorphins, which are pleasure inducing. If you can get addicted to other things, why not endorphins?

[jimberan]

Hmm, my ex girl friend accused me of being addicted to sex! I can't see anything wrong with that though! Sex is a beautiful thing.

[britjojo]

At the risk of being jumped on here, I want to say that only women can be sex addicts. The other gender......well, they are men. Wanting sex every minute of the day is the NORMAL state for a man!

[jimberan]

Is there some type of talk group for female recovering sex addicts? I would love to attend one of those sessions and give counceling.:D

[crassus]

At the risk of being jumped on here, I want to say that only women can be sex addicts. The other gender......well, they are men. Wanting sex every minute of the day is the NORMAL state for a man!

That's true. Where can I get some more?

[chloe88]

In some cases QUIETLUNATIC, it's the former, but more than likely it's the latter. If one is not getting any closeness, whether emotional or sexual, one will look further for it. Every human desires closeness and love with another human being. It's just the way God made us. To not have it, is to deny a portion of the soul. To have it is to be connected to the universe and the soul as we can only know it.

[PUJA]

If your sexual behavior is out of control and you cannot stop even if you want to, and it is having negative consequences in your work, relationships or family, the answer is probably yes.

Are you spending too much time on the internet browsing or in chat rooms and/or porn sites, engaging in cybersex, being a regular in massage parlors, strip joints and prostitutes, having affairs or masturbating too often, you might be looking at the symptoms of sex addiction.

[fightForfreedom]

Hey, sorry for bringing up such an old thread. It doesn't seem as though these forums get a whole lot of attention though. I noticed above someone asked the question along the lines of "what does it mean to be a sex addict?" Well, I'm not an expert, definitely not, haha. A group I work with sometimes is putting out some material to help people in different areas deal with sexual addiction. I already posted asking why there wasn't an entire section devoted to sexual addiction. Anyways, if any of you are interested in watching a little demo-ad-video about why they are trying to make a difference here's the link:
vid (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zfoGtb_YuPM)

I'm curious to see what you all think. It's a faith based organization (AKA Christian) but from my understanding sexual addiction, along with all other addictions, does not discriminate between gender/race/age OR religion.

[aima123]

I agree with you fight. Being addicted to sex doesn't choose any gender. I didn't agree that sex addiction is only for woman. There are also man who are addicted on it. Just like those man who committed a sex even to their daughters because of their maniacs ability in sex. (maniac is the other term for sex addiction).

[PneumaticMuffin]

At the risk of being jumped on here, I want to say that only women can be sex addicts. The other gender......well, they are men. Wanting sex every minute of the day is the NORMAL state for a man!

Theres a difference between thinking about sex every now and then and watching porn 5 hours a day and masturbating endlessly. Men are not immune to this somehow and women certainly arent the only ones affected.

[mtajim]

I have never seen a sex addicts but yes i have heard of people who always think of having sex. I think its a very bad state of mind of thinking of sex everytime

[fightForfreedom]

It's definitely interesting to see that we're wired a certain way. Most sex addicts can trace their addiction back to a single point in life. Whether it was sexual abuse as a child, access to pornography at a young age, or one of numerous other events that people would rather forget. I believe it's starting to surface more and more though, but few counselors are equipped to help patients. Friends and family don't know what to do to help or encourage a person who is struggling either. Unlike alcoholism, drug addiction, and other addictions sex is one of those topics most people feel uncomfortable talking about. It makes people blush, or laugh. When you tell someone that there is such thing as sexual addiction most of the time they say "isn't that normal? aren't we supposed to love sex?" People don't understand the effects it can cause on their life, their spouse, and even their family.

[skitszo]

how would you get yourself free from this completely? I'm a single christian and i'm taught that you don't use self abuse or pornography thats it sinful. I'm ok with that and i have an erroneous idea that being married is suppose to end this cause you have someone, but i'm getting the picture that it won't help...thats scary. How do i get this out of my system?:confused:

[Ricardo]

how would you get yourself free from this completely? I'm a single christian and i'm taught that you don't use self abuse or pornography thats it sinful. I'm ok with that and i have an erroneous idea that being married is suppose to end this cause you have someone, but i'm getting the picture that it won't help...thats scary. How do i get this out of my system?:confused:

Are you saying you were taught that basic masturbation was self abuse? If so, I believe you've been misled.

Also imagine an unfortunate possibility of never having any sexual experience including masturbation for, let's say 25 years of your life and then marrying someone who discovered they weren't interested in sex with you at all.

[MHJ]

I remember Jerry Butler discussing this topic at length on TV a couple decades ago. It was a pretty interesting interview on a local station

[fightForfreedom]

Take a look at some of these videos posted on www.freedombeginshere.org. The feature Dr. Gary Smalley, a well known author and speaker on family relationships. These guys are really trying to make a difference for people struggling with sexual addiction. I thought they were pretty encouraging. What do you all think?

[james]

how would you get yourself free from this completely? I'm a single christian and i'm taught that you don't use self abuse or pornography thats it sinful. I'm ok with that and i have an erroneous idea that being married is suppose to end this cause you have someone, but i'm getting the picture that it won't help...thats scary. How do i get this out of my system?:confused:

Seriously, do not worry about this unless you see symptoms of an obsession (which you act out). Sex addiction is a different creature from a pure interest in sex. If you're avoiding self-abuse and pornography you are almost certainly OK.

[laurah]

I think people who are having sex with their daughters are called peodophiles, not sex addicts. Thats a different addiction altogether. And I agree, its not fair to say that all men are sex addicts because thats' simply not true.

[hazephase]

So how much of pron is a ok ? at what point is it a addiction ? is it not good to learn more about sex ? at what stage are you learning and at what stage are you addicted ? or at what stage are you just enjoying

[ggnu]

I fear I am a misogynist. I have fantasies about dominating women. Where can I go to get help. I am not a physical threat. I just feel a lot of guilt and discomfort with my thoughts.

[hazephase]

Its not a bad idea for you to try this in the bed room as that may help you get rid of the though . How do you feel about woman ? do you feel equal to them ?

[VietXKosuke]

I think it's just sexual gratification. They can't get enough of it. Just like some people can't get enough coffee, or tea for example.

[attagirl]

In my book sex addiction is one that is often overlooked. But is a very serious thing. For those people that are addicted to sex it can be a large problem because they will not be able to stop having sex. They are putting themselves at big risks with deseases and aids, etc.

[jr_sci]

Sex is no harm untill and unless it is practised with an unique person. Research shows that daily sex can develope male fertility.

[fightForfreedom]

Hey everyone, it's been a while since I posted. I would like to encourage those seeking solutions to their addictions or anyone that wants to help encourage a friend or family member to check out www.freedombeginshere.org again.

[paulw772]

Check out recoverycoachonline.com this guy has been very helpful to me in my sexual addiction recovery process.
Paul

[esbesnez]

At the risk of being jumped on here, I want to say that only women can be sex addicts. The other gender......well, they are men. Wanting sex every minute of the day is the NORMAL state for a man!i absolutely agree to your view that men are born with an abnormal insatiable sexual apetite.

[happyguy]

i want all of use to remember that we are made with an inborn desire for sex. But the degree of the desire varies feom one person to another. I think it is wrong to say that sexual desire is more strong in men that in women. I thinkis correect to say that the degree of sexuall desire is largely controlled by an individual. it is when the urge is uncontroallble that a perosn becomes an addict and hsould seek help immediately.

[Swastik]

For some people who are sex addicts, behavior does not change beyond compulsive masturbation or the extensive use of pornography or phone or computer sex services.

It has been seen that child molesters are sex addicts.

[jason15]

Okay I am a female and I would be considered a sex addict. I have been married for 16 years and have lost interest in my husband because of his laziness and lack of motivation over the years. To this I turned to the internet and starting chatting with men who made me feel good. This soon led to meeting people in person. Not one person but many. It is like a fix. I feel the need and take care of it. Whether it be phone sex or real sex. Then when I go home I feel more friendly to my husband. I know its crazy. I have stopped over the past several months because he sort of found out and he doesnt understand why I dont want sex with him but all of these other guys. Its not really because im horny that I do it. It is almost a fantasy in my head that I pretend I am in love with these guys. I mean the guys I have been seeing for a while...its like I want to tell them I love them and it takes care of my feelings for the moment. It feels like real love for me that I never can feel with my own husband. I think that is what sex addiction is about. I need the "fix". I am trying to work through it but it is very difficult to find a therapist who can help me with this sort of issue. It is pretty deep. and for those of you who may consider me a bad person or a slut its not like that at all. I am an attractive, professional female with a side that I cant seem to fix. Right now just to kiss my husband or have him touch me is a bit sickening to me. Unfortunately, I have many issues to deal with. Thanks for listening.

[djplatinum52]

Maybe you just are not being fulfilled by your husband therefore your actions are more than justified. Consider seperating.

[gfm001]

I am sure there may be some theories of common ground in here when you consider the impulse. But your out of place in a drug recovery site. Because you took the time to tell us convicts, drug addicts, and pill poppers about your impulse to get laid every day by another person I would like to answer your thoughts provided you are not pissed off yet with my remarks.
Your desires escalated because you allowed your husband, boyfriend or whoever he is to become bored with you. Instead of trying to spark excitement back into him which you should of done you became obsessed with the idea of taking on strangers hoping for an experience of a life time. You hit one or two and ran with that as the great answer to your desired demands to have organisms. You have enjoyed getting off so much that you have now convinced yourself the only way to have a great sexual experience is by taking on others instead of your old man.
As far as I am concern your just a whore. You have become one of them women us guys like to have those one night stands with and pass on to my friends provided you pass our test. Or just leave, we don't care cause we know what you are anyways and we just don't care. Surely you have found one or two of those lonely chaps that stumbled on to you and called for another date or two just because they are tired of looking for a new thing and you probably came easy to them. In your statement of wondering if your addicted to sex, what a thought, who ain't. Thank God there are still a great many of us even though we sold our souls to Satan we still believe in our wives and wives that stay true to their husbands.
Look lady, you either zip up your pants and get your butt home and learn to take care of that man who married you or get out. If you choose to leave just tell him what you really are. If you have screwed some of his friends then claim to him you haven't what ever you do, no matter what. Don't start other battles because of what you have done. Or you learn to keep your eyes to your self, learn to respect yourself, and pray God doesn't toss you in the void of darkness for a thousand years. So far he will be. :p

[gfm001]

For some I could see it as being a self esteem issue. After all, it is for some going to appear, by the act of sex, as though you are wanted, and if you don't feel wanted any other time it might meet that need.

But I also think that there can be a chemical aspect to it too, like being addicted to a drug. Orgasm causes the release of endorphins, which are pleasure inducing. If you can get addicted to other things, why not endorphins?
WHAT? I must be in Patton Place. If you can not be straight up about this then you shouldn't try to answer the thought process. Simple, she's a whore. Simple and to the point.

[gfm001]

I agree with you fight. Being addicted to sex doesn't choose any gender. I didn't agree that sex addiction is only for woman. There are also man who are addicted on it. Just like those man who committed a sex even to their daughters because of their maniacs ability in sex. (maniac is the other term for sex addiction).
Those men are sick in the mind and in the heart. Lock em up and toss the key. Remember, they watch TV too. They know if they touch OUR children then they have to silent them too. Killing them is what they do after they do what ever they want to do on these children. God please don't place drug addiction along these lines because they are two totally different things. Let's not get the public thinking along those lines either. Many people have no idea how drug addiction works and all it takes is post like the one you just did to start a fire.

[gfm001]

I agree with you fight. Being addicted to sex doesn't choose any gender. I didn't agree that sex addiction is only for woman. There are also man who are addicted on it. Just like those man who committed a sex even to their daughters because of their maniacs ability in sex. (maniac is the other term for sex addiction).
Those men are sick in the mind and in the heart. Lock em up and toss the key. Remember, they watch TV too. They know if they touch OUR children then they have to silent them too. Killing them is what they do after they do what ever they want to do on these children. God please don't place drug addiction along these lines because they are two totally different things. Let's not get the public thinking along those lines either. Many people have no idea how drug addiction works and all it takes is post like the one you just did to start a fire.

[jason15]

Wow do you feel better now? It is pigs like you that women are forced to deal with. Obviously, you arent getting any or you would not be so angry. This particular thread was about sex addiction not drug addiction. If you notice there are many other addictions discussed on this website but it appears you are too busy looking for a post that irritates you enough to respond. So why the hell did you waste your time giving me such an idiotic response to something you know nothing about. Of course, you are going to make a joke of the situation but I dont really give a shit what you have to say. I love what you said about "allowing my husband to become bored with me" and "wives staying true to their husbands". Unfortunately, there are too many men on this planet who choose to act like complete assholes and think it is up to the female to keep the marriage going. Which really makes me sad for the other women out there that are married to men such as yourself. Why would we waste our time trying to make a spark with someone of this nature. If anything, you helped me to appreciate what I do have at home and I am thankful he still has a few more brain cells left than you appear to have. Get your head out of your ass and that might help you.

[jenny]

Although I do not know much about it but whatever I have learned from surfing net -Sexual addiction is a behavioral pattern of a person who has an unusually intense sex drive. it is also called sexual compulsion and prevails with both men as well as women. It can even happen with the young and old. It is prevalent in all races and religions.

[jenny]

Is there some type of talk group for female recovering sex addicts? I would love to attend one of those sessions and give counceling.:D

Is it so? Have patience. I am thinking to introduce you as a counsellor if I come across any such session. HAhahaha...........ha.......h....a.