Ex-Husband Admits Casual Use

[nonstopbegonia]

I saw track marks on my ex-husband's left forearm and was horrified. Since then, he has admitted using heroin "every few weeks" for the past 18 months. What I want to know is how long can someone continue to delude himself that he can "casually" use heroin when he wants to? I mean, won't the desire for the high and the need to avoid withdrawal pain start to rule his life? He says not to worry, that he is managing everything just fine. How long can people really do this? How much would it cost him to use every day? How cheap is this new Mexican stuff? He refuses to go to treatment; insists he's got it all under control. He looks awful. I know I can fix things; but what is his likely prognosis??? He is 54 and smokes. The children tried an intervention two years ago which failed (for alcoholism). Now he tells the kids he doesn't drink and they are all cheerful that he has healed himself. Ha! Little do they know.

[mtajim]

some people can control there nerves , but some will just lie that they take drugs casual . You have to look how much your ex-husband is taking it . If its regular than i think its time to control it.

[shinningstar]

I think action speaks louder than words. Try to observe how he behaves at home. You can detect some symptoms of taking drugs regularly. I observed the same thing at home. My brother refused drug treatment because he's addicted of using it. He lied to us but we bought his alibis.

[mtajim]

And if you find some unusual things in house which is used in taking drugs than you can surely find if your husband is taking drugs or not . Just try to search his secret places , you might find some evidence

[jimberan]

Try to gather as many friends as relatives as you can find and jump him with a meeting. Make him understand that he needs treatment and that he needs to go into rehab for the sake of his kids.

[britjojo]

I have to be honest, I have never liked the gang up on them approach. It is too confrontational, and with something like heroin addiction I would fear that becoming dangerous.

In agreement with Shinningstar though, if you see him often enough you should be able to track the pattern of highs and lows. That should tell you how often he is doing it. Other than that, try and educate him is all I can suggest.

[MHJ]

That can be a pretty tough thing to have to deal with. It must come as a supreme shock to hear such info out of the blue

[exjunky]

What I want to know is how long can someone continue to delude himself that he can "casually" use heroin when he wants to? I mean, won't the desire for the high and the need to avoid withdrawal pain start to rule his life?

People who use heroin once in a while and therefore avoid withdrawal are sometimes called "chippers". VERY FEW people can do this. Nearly everybody ends up getting sucked into it deeply and badly. That doesn't mean it's impossible, but for 9 people out of 10 (at least) the habit only gets bigger as time goes on.

How much would it cost him to use every day? How cheap is this new Mexican stuff?

Make no mistake about it--it will consume every dollar he has. It will drain the bank account, it will put his favorite guitar in hock, he might lose his car and his house and everything else he owns just to feed his greedy veins.

No good heroin comes from Mexico, just black tar heroin, and on a dollar-per-dollar basis it will eat your funds as quickly as any other kind of heroin.

To be more specific: a bad heroin habit will cost $100/day. A *really* bad habit will cost $400/day. And that's just the raw cost of the dope, not adding in all of the hidden costs that come when everything around you starts to disintegrate.

He refuses to go to treatment; insists he's got it all under control. He looks awful.

Something here doesn't add up. He says he uses every few weeks, but you say he looks awful. Plus, you spotted his track marks? People who use only a few times a month don't sport track marks. If he looks awful on a day to day basis then quite frankly I think he's already lying to you about the extent of his habit.

I know I can fix things; but what is his likely prognosis???

The prognosis depends on him. If he wants to quit he'll quit. He'll never be "cured" in the sense that a relapse is 100% impossible, but some people go clean for 5, 10, 20 years, or more.

On the other hand, if he really doesn't want to quit, if he is deluding himself that he's got it under control, then I fear things might have to get a lot worse in his life before he decides to make changes.

[jade]

no such thing as "casual" herion use. especially when you are injecting. even if it starts out as a weekend thing, it never stays that way.

[buttonfluff]

hi casuall use every few weeks wouldnt cause track marks there wouldnt be enough injections..denial of addiction ...........

[LW75]

I have to be honest, I have never liked the gang up on them approach. It is too confrontational, and with something like heroin addiction I would fear that becoming dangerous.

In agreement with Shinningstar though, if you see him often enough you should be able to track the pattern of highs and lows. That should tell you how often he is doing it. Other than that, try and educate him is all I can suggest.

I agree that the gang-up approach isn't always the best. Not that I have anything people would need to gang up over, but I know if a group of friends and relatives did an "intervention" I would never, ever, forgive them - just on principle. There's a kind of lynch mob mentality to that, so I think its really risky.

I have heard of people who can usual "casually", and I was surprised to hear that. He's playing with fire, though.

[exjunky]

First somebody really does use it "casually". Then before they know it, they've copped a major-league habit, but if you ask them they will be in denial and continue to say that they use it "casually."

The fact that she noticed visible needlemarks on his arms makes me believe strongly that he has graduated beyond casual use. I hope I'm wrong but that's how I see it.

Best of luck.

[laurah]

As everyone else has said, you can't casually use heroin, it's not like a crafty cigarrete, or being a social drinker, its about the hardest form of narcotic you can get. It's highly addictive and he needs to face up to that.

[HhasMeHooked]

I casually used heroin for about 4 years only because my connection was 200 miles away once i finished school at the university and moved to the city where i had the connection within 8 months, i had drained the bank account, pawned all my cool things, lost my job and ran thousands of dollars of credit card debt and bad checks. He is just fooling himself he may have a handle on it at the moment but you could wake up tomorrow to a whole different person.

The first and foremost thing you need to know is thing you need to know is
A JUNKIE WILL LIE! right to your face looking you square in the eye if it will help them get their smack he will tell you the grass in the lawn is purple without blinking an eye.

[websurfpro]

He can be a casual drug user , but still it is not good , try to talk to him about it , this is the only way you can help him, if he is addicted ask him to go and get the help he need anywhere.